Does World Wrestling Entertainment have any business producing a cop thriller? They have already tried their hand at horror with 2006's "See No Evil," and we all know how that turned out. On the basis of that and their newest film, "12 Rounds," maybe they should leave movies alone and just stick to what they know best (then again, pro wrestling is about as staged as anything done by a movie studio). Had they not been involved, I think it's safe to say that John Cena wouldn't have been cast, that director Renny Harlin would have been allowed to audition actors capable of projecting credibility. It would be too harsh to say that Cena's performance was bad, but he definitely didn't convince me that he was a cop, or even that he was trying to be a cop. He only convinced me that a pro wrestler was cast to play a cop in a movie. It could be worse, I suppose--at least he didn't turn to the camera and shout, "The champ is here!"



Of course, some of the blame has to go to Harlin, who seems more invested in clever camera angles and action sequences than in story. Some of the visuals are decent enough, but the very concept is implausible from the word go, and it only gets more implausible with every scene. Taking place in New Orleans, the story begins in 2007, when a wanted Irish weapons dealer named Miles Jackson (Aidan Gillen) is finally caught. His girlfriend is killed that same night, and he blames Officer Danny Fisher (Cena), who responded to the call for backup. As he's being handcuffed, Jackson vows revenge, saying to Fisher, "I'll remember you."



Flash forward one year. Fisher has been promoted to the rank of Detective, and he's in a committed relationship with his girlfriend, Molly (Ashley Scott). Through a series of unlikely events, Jackson escapes from prison and returns to New Orleans on the anniversary of his girlfriend's death. He then kidnaps Molly and forces Fisher to participate in a game consisting of twelve rounds, each designed to be physically and ethically challenging. Each round brings Fisher to a new location in the city, where a strategically placed clue has been left behind. I won't get into a detailed description of every challenge; needless to say, they get more and more elaborate in their plotting and execution, which means they get less and less plausible with every passing scene. If Fisher manages to pass all twelve rounds, Molly will be set free.



Fisher and Jackson keep in touch via constant cell phone calls, and somehow or another, Jackson is always able to cover his tracks. This is especially frustrating to George Aiken (Steve Harris), a special agent for the FBI; for personal reasons, he too is after Jackson, and no one, not even a cop like Danny Fisher, is going to stop him. This subplot might have worked had the tension between New Orleans police and the FBI not been so forced and predictable. Aiken is the proverbial Man on a Mission, and to hell with Fisher and his kidnapped girlfriend. Of course, there inevitably comes a point at which everything depends solely on Fisher, which is to say that even the driven George Aiken will have to step aside and let things happen the way they're supposed to happen.



While not a wholly engaging or even original story, it still seems interesting enough on first glance. But as the film progresses, it quickly becomes clear that the filmmakers are grabbing at straws, desperate to make some kind of connection with the audience. By the end, I got the sense that nothing of significance occurred, that I wasn't seeing a story unfold so much as I was watching a series of images pass before my eyes. Much like a paint-by-numbers kit, this movie is manufactured and artless, every colorful nuance predetermined and placed only where they're supposed to be placed. Not even the more exciting sections--such as when Fisher has to stop a runaway cable car from plowing through a crowd--were all that surprising or entertaining.



And then there's the dialogue, which is really nothing more than a collection of shallow one-liners and cliché cop statements. Pretty much all of the latter is heard between Fisher and his partner, Detective Hank Carver (Brian White), who seems less like a developed character and more like a plot convenience.



But the real failure of "12 Rounds" is the involvement of World Wrestling Entertainment, who saw fit to cast a man incapable of playing a cop. John Cena may be a gifted performer in a wrestling ring, but when it comes to movies--many of which require a sense of depth and complexity--there's a lot to be desired. The same can be said for the story, which is so uninteresting that I eventually stopped caring whether or not Molly would survive her ordeal. When I searched for cast and crew information on IMDb.com, I became aware of a twenty-minute film that also goes by the title "12 Rounds." It tells the story of a bisexual boxer who struggles with his sexual orientation. This got me thinking: What if Renny Harlin's "12 Rounds" were about a bisexual cop torn between his kidnapped girlfriend and his detective partner? Or better yet, what he finds himself falling for his girlfriend's kidnapper? Now that's what I call an interesting story.